Wednesday 29 September 2010

SIGH***

WOke up at 6 something today... Since i turned down the field trip for the sake of The Woman's quiz, I went to the closing ceremony for the IMETC 2010 at Putra Hotel. The photography students were practically forced to go since our lecturer was the chairman of the function. The so called photography exhibition and competition begin on the 27/10/10. My picture was last minute and without a proper cam, all i wanted was just to hand in my work. Getting prizes were equivalent to A in the final. Bloody unfair right.... oh well...


RM 70 for lousy day and sigh... it can only get worst by accepting a stupid call. i guess that was the main reason y i hate receiving calls....
I got the chance to visit Perpustakaan Negara...Damn. Rupa-rupanya, PTSL is way canggih than the national library. Well, PTSL was recognize as the south east Asia best, largest n sistematic library....Once or might still is... Was slightly dissapointed.




 And i found this.... Wah.... my 1st reaction was... Hey.... that's my book... Serously... no! I mean, that was my fav book when i was in F6... miss those days~

Ada portrait feel ha?

Then nite, Practice.... Tcher not here...luckily...Was sickly, sleepy, and very unhappie.... nobody noes... just me.... Or else kena scold again and my name will echo around Pusanika again~

U guys are my best Remedy~


Saturday 25 September 2010

PT 31st Preview show

About my personal life..... seriously nothing to say...

Never been so unlucky in mylife.... NEVER!!! 

In fact, i have never been in good's either... Watever la... 

Getting back my lappy with files unscratched is a blessing... I shud push other annoyance aside...
At these very complicated yet dramatic phrase of my life...seriously, i am thankful to my besties... u noe who u are...and all my PT dancers.... without u all, my depression could go suicidal...

Anyway, the only thing i felt contented with is our PT preview show at 24/9/10 at Dewan Persatuan Hokkien, Kajang. very glad with the positive reviews despite all of us the dancers knowing there were slight off form our best efforts. But maturity in stage senses is one compliment i have for us. Pictures n videos tell it all.... I need to rush my reading soon....
 the preview stage

 the super old dancers....erm~

 melody n i

 sly n i

 my gals~


 the actors



 junior dancers come visit~

 the unity

proud to say that i love u all

Saturday 18 September 2010

PT moments

Just finished 2nd full rehearsal.

Was back on Wednesday evening. Damn, i was alone in the whole block. 

I shud be very scared as there was no sense of life in the building. Not even a cat or monkey! But since i kena teruk teruk by dancing tcher due to blurness (sleepy...hana....sleepy la...XD), so i was so full of guiltiness that i forgotten i was all alone. The coming rehearsal on friday and saturday was so much better. At least not much mistakes overall. The opening dance will be display on the Karnival day.... Full dress rehearsal will due soon. Sigh.... now need to settle my proposal, lotsa assignments which will clash with PT is i dun settle it now, 2 midsems..... 

BIG BIG SIGH

But, seeing all my dancers so united and happie with all bruises made me feel that the whole scarification I made is worth the pain and the post busy-ness. 

I love you guys so much!!!

Seriously, i was never as hurt, physically before.... not in PT

while practicing....

coursemate aka dancers aka dear dear

One of the gal who accompanied me in PT for 3 years... the one with SLY is a blur shot...aiks!

while resting during rehearsal

PT 31st Unity

So much efforts has poured in and i will enjoy n cherish my last PT dancing experience bit by bit. 

The performance night is on 10/10/10.

Do come an support us! Support the birth of local Musical theater... starting with Pesta Tanglung 31st Malam Persembahan Pentas. Tickets are on sales now!

A night i will always remember the most and i am glad I'm sharing it with all 13 of u!

 I wish you could share it with me too!

Finally a good night sleep tonight... =) To all dancers, rest gao gao ba.... we deserved it <3 hahaha

Monday 6 September 2010

PT gang

Yesterday was a happie day despite everything else. PT unity never fails to make me happie. Dancing was tiring... I realized that i have not have much improvement lately due to lack of pain while stretching...Since i fear pain, i will always avoid warm up techniques that needs more efforts. I was always wondering why couldn't my tummy touch the floor when my legs are already 180 degree wide... Yesterday nite was my 1st attempt... very painful.... but it was possible. 
 
 
The next thing is to regain my full split which last year, i was merely few cms of the floor... Sigh. Fear strikes in and i don't dare to sit on the floor... This year, is my last, and i shall attempt it no matter what...
 
 
The gathering after the practice season was wonderful... it has been quite some moments that i have forgotten i could laugh this loud. Love em all

wonder y the limau is there....erm, haha...as mole

Erm, can we go back Alfariz next time.... The food there not clean eh.... lou sai this morning...> <

LOL

Happie Holiday to all =)


Friday 3 September 2010

I need a bigger room, a huge space, a sanctuary i call home. A place i can always freely dance, a spot where i can always sing... 

A destiny where creativity is wisdom and sadness is sinful.

Where days i can see sun rise... and nights, nothings but shooting starts... Blinking starts accompany my sleep every hours till i find another reason to wake up every morning.

Wonderful dreams become reality and dramas become nightmares....

Do you noe how much it hurts to dream what you always yearn for but realize it is merely just a dream that will never occur... n you can do nothing about it.... that disappointment is so bad, it kills
 
You don't know

You don't 

I wish you don't... enough for one to suffers... I had enough dealing with mine, i wish all my friends are blessed with happiness that i am lacked of... 

Your presence to me is the biggest sympathy Almighty ever given me...

I will appreciate...

Well, i dun believe in HIM tho... I hate whoever make me sad... including HIM.

Wednesday 1 September 2010

Moody

Lately...Well, now...

I no longer able to hide myself n mask my emotion. When I'm moody and sad by the drama they caused, i burst, i throw things, hardly scream tho....lastly i cry and after cooling down, i might sing songs. What a flow....

Last time, whenver things happen, the next things you see should be me laughing even harder and act crazier as the class clown. I seek for fun... badly. 

I see changes now tho... I sometimes was being called emo... I might probably enjoy people talking and listen to them rather than joining the conversation or i would isolate.... pretend to be doing something.

I thought the harder i laugh, i could be happier. The more fun i seek, the more i can escape from the misery. No... once every lil fun ends, i feel even lonelier that it makes it worse. 

As i get elder, I realised i got weaker emotionally. I am tired of being tough, strong... someone who will never fail supporting someone else, shoulder 24/7 availability.... When you are that unbreakable as you make people believe so, in time they will forget you are just merely protected by a shell of amour. Eventually, it will shatter and broken. 

I wish you could understand and be wise enough to get a life
As dependable as i am, I need you to noe i have my limit...

Somehow my limits range has been cut... I can no longer tolerate much...

I felt like a ballon right now... all i got is input... there is no hole for my anger and sober to flow out... I felt stiffed... 

 I need to breath easy....

If you ever caught me teary eye, ignore me. I am trying my level best to avoid my friends whenever i need such moment. I can not bare not smiling to my friends when they approach me, but it just belied my feeling. I feel fake... So, i choose to avoid.