Monday, 28 September 2009

6days to PT-30 performance

i'm feeling kinda lost...
i really wanted to perform my very best... somehow... i will still lost focus n cannot deliver the dance well... i will still be able to screw up in some lil parts here and there... am i not hardworking enough? or am i not strong enough mentally and physically? it seems that i got very tired and blur easily....the other few gals who dance 6 pieces managed to control their energy and keep it going. or am i simply not good enough?
it seems like tchers enjoy to catch my some say they focus alot on me due to senior status.... cuz not possible i am the only one who make it because im one of the front runner so there is no forgiveness in making mistakes? aduh...they just love calling my name... JOANNE!!! then i'll be like huh.... yaya, i noe...sorry.... aduh... i knew i made mistakes... but i still make it. arghhhh.... i really hate myself! but, at least i noe what i did wrong to better myself... having their attention also means that i am one of the most watched. wondering if it's due to my capabilities or incapability....haha
feel so bad n sorry for the tchers for having me in da dance troupe. i just dont seems to meet the expectation.... which i seriously think i can.
now my only way to contribute to the memorable nite is to stay very focus and enjoy da dance. tenseness and losing focus are the 2 things that make me much more outstanding n prone to mistakes. they gotta go....
this challenge, tho harsh and kinda painful to go thru but no denial it's da best thing i ever been through thus far. satisfying and it worth all the sacrificial i made.
hmmm, gotta put everything esp the insects collection aside.... aisey. cham!!! not even half of the amount....

Friday, 25 September 2009

one week to performance

time really flies
ONE more week and the whole dancing program will be over
all our pt geng effort will be on stage and present to all audience
i dunno whether i'm more worry or hessitent to end it that fast.... i will always miss it... it's actually this kindda missing feeling that i felt last year that brought me back to PT this year....
i noe i did improve in many way, yet i'm still not the best n kinda dissapoiting also...
i can feel teachers expectation on me- at least to master steps fast and do it beautifully... somehow, my biggest problem is i lost focus easily...
i will do my best
no trying
will make it de
i almost can split '1 zhi mah'
anothing to be proud of
i like everything about this 30th PT
excoS are nice...dancing FWENS are fantastic....DANCING is FUN and totally satisfying
teachers are my gosh...haha. COOL la
awh, i got accepted in NEwTuNE singing 2nd audition. surprizingly, with not prepared condition, i sang angel n hand in my pocket, n i got accepted. wat de.... anyway, im flattered with the news tho wasnt exactly expecting it. i went for it as i love singing so so much that if i skip it, i will hate myself not doing it. so, no regret la.
looking forward to a fantastic journey with my PT geng.... it will be a history of us, together as one team
happy to dance n share this glory with u guys
++oil babes

Tuesday, 15 September 2009


i almost didnt make it to the new tune audition
no matter how far i stray from the mike and singing
no matter how much more ge myself fully devoted to dancing
singing is still my thing
i never am the best singer but i love my voice.
it's the best asset i own since i was very young
something im most proud and never am ashamed about
the passion will never dies
after a so so audition, i just wish last year problem won't occurs. i seriously dun mind not being accepted
*then i bump to ah bi no 1, my direct junior*
with full force, i kick him in the audition n watch him present.
really well done
..... i can see positive faces from the seniors.....
then we hiao 2gether by changing each other status
***in relationship with------***
-its fun-
christopher dun mind yea... ur turn soon.
dun rampas my ah bi
*hope he dun mis un ba*
*but the more u drag, the more i rush for one real relationship*
-if a better one come knocking on my door, i might just wun wait for u-
esp wen i so wanted comfort n a shoulder to count on
im tired being independent
i needed a break

Sunday, 13 September 2009

UKM-PT da 30th.... preview show...pweetie shots

yea....da show started

everyone was ready to giv a good show

i was being lifted at the back

can see wer am i? lol...the 1st from the right speeding


no eye c le....haha

new found bestie... very nice gal

yea... watever.... i do hav tht figure k....

dun ask ...we just like this shot so so much

fantastic team spirit...

brovo for the good preview many of good comments... but to us who noe da dance, it wasnt up to 80% satisfaction... anyhow, 3/10 it shall be a perfecto presentation. i love all of da dancers... such blessing noeing all of u.... beautiful people and it's my biggest pleasure spending n sharing all my happiness n experience this sem with u guys.
muah muah

its final
im dancing 6 pieces of dance
i believe whoever love performing will never mind about doing more than she should or giving/sacrifice more than anyone else
infact, one will be glad to get acknowledgement of ones skill and determination
i am now in this position
but these few days i started to wonder if i am good enough to handle all 6 pieces
is the pressure thickened without me realising it?
somehow i feel the confidence level of mind drop sharply after attending hiphop practice
i was very blurry these few days
lost focus and i feel my progress of improvement suddenly stop generating
i hope this is only temporily during my pms cycle.....
shud be over soon.... dun disturb me during the most anticipating event im looking forward to

Friday, 11 September 2009

PT-UKM preview show

A success


da day start off blurry

1. i decided to skip lousy fisio class again...cuz i need more sleep or else i end up havin more injuries...i beh tahan pain in any form one... weak jcdagreat huh

2. no choice but to be present for the Entomology lab... so many sleepy. thanks to my bio gals, i can leave the lab earlier to join the rehersal which postponed...diu

3. i borrow my roomie tights and singlet early in the morning...luckily she has them... i thought i brought em to ukm dy... haiz. i go promise ppl to borrow them the extra tiam...paiseh

4. i wore a 3/4 shorts to the karnival n only realise it has a big big hole in the middle when i was warming up.... i hav to immediately wear my tights and sew it back...which is very diu lien la....

5. so sleepy that i was lying on the floor for so long untill everyone keep guessing if i have asleep...haha. i did but, easily awaken... miss alot of cam whoring...ish

6. rehersal was okay but, due to the size of the stage, everythg have to reshape and rearrange...

7. i like my make up ur info, i am a ghost in da dance....

8. then, before the preview, we went out to the karnival to eat dinner...but the main purpose is to scare and get attention...self promoting ma... damn fun to see so many outsiders funnily staring at us and take photos....haha....

9. when we almost ready to get on stage, we were told that our performance is postponed to 10.00pm.... we were shitty provoked and my senior Darren was in flame...LOL

10. luckily, they finally realise the fact of the consequences and ask us to prepare...

11. wasn't really scare...infact was quite focus... once the light dimmed and spot light on and when the mist was realese, the feeling came.... i like the screaming effect by dunno who and the comments i received were good. majorly positive....

12. so happy to see my friends supporting da show.... love them so much.... feel so good especially it was an impressive show. the ex dancers were there too... having their compliments are most appreciated. gen soon and jia loong...muaks

13. i love all da dancers and the spirit we share... i came back this year to dance is not just because i love dancing or contemp'... i actually love new jazz better....those sexy slutty female dance. but i just love the team spirit and togatherness we shared. thanks darren for this... he is one good leader when he dont get angry...leo-rean, un un la.

14. he was there... i dunnoe who he was looking forward to see or what ever reason that brought him there, i just like the fact that i saw him there during my special night and i was impressive- minuse the ghostly look on my face...ish. practically, it wasnt me on the stage but when i came down the stage, that look will be too shoking for me to show off....haha

i like how the arrangement goes and the tchers and directors are so proffesional. looking forward to a closer bonding in all the family members in PT-30.

once, i finnish dance, which was just a moment, from a high point, i drop back to the average mood...which was very hard to accept...this will be the feeling i have on the real day. 3/10. it would be worst!!!

oh yea...during da last part when we were about to give a group bow, the ghost have to crawl up da stage... the carpet wounded my knee skin...ish...pain. luckily no blood. thanks for my palm for behaving cuz it didnt hurt much today....

i fallen from a two legged off the ground kick and i was ashamedly crashed down the floor and hurt my wrist.... big spot of dark green spot n unbearable pain the day b4...1st time injury







Tuesday, 8 September 2009

mix feeling....

it seems that i hav yet to get a moment of break from since wen yea??
i thought i will enjoy busyness... hell yea... wat was i thinking? if they are under my control... i dun c why not i shud enjoy it...
dancing journey has been great. im one of the chosen dancers and might needed to dance for 5 pieces. im considered the experienced one and after a year of practices, da improvement shud be obvious ba...
this year got hip hop also...
i can finally learn it in a correct way rather than shaking n groving alone in da bath room...
dun ask n dun imagine anythg notthy.
every classes although are tiring but i always leave the class with so much satisfaction. this is one real satisfaction NewTune yet to be able to giv me... i wonder if i should continue to go for the singer audition after what i suffer emotionally last sem.
this year marks a huge changes in me.... i dunnoe how to describe it... i am so much willing and looking forward to noe frens. the conscious thinking, nonsence all-gal schooled up bringing-me particularly about to be disminished.
finally the much awaited fac nite which i dearly appreciated came to an end. there was a moment i so wish to cry when i hug my mc. im still much in that moment...yet wanna leave it for good... heavy hearted eh.
after all the helpless moments and anger i wish to burst out but end up suffered silently.... a success despite sum havoc.
i love my juniors so much.... hardly any bias feeling while making decision... lol.... hey, im just a human afterall k....
seriously control my biasness to the max.... i hope the result satisfy everyone.... they all are my babies no matter who wins.
i seriously love being a senior which i thought i will hate so much.
a elder sis is always with da sis i only wish i could treat my brother more like my brother instead of shapping him so hard.... to be sumone like me... i wanted the best for him, at the same time i want him to be mature thinking... im not sure if this is was the best thing for him.... i always fear making the wrong move n spoil him in any way.... y am i thinking so much.... i love him.
hopeless sister i am...

Saturday, 5 September 2009

fac nite of life science 09/10 (5/9/09)

(i still cant believe n digest that ivan do that MJ chock grabbing impersonation)


-me master piece-

-close up-

-me n king-

Im very glad the nite went smoothly despite havoc, unwell arrangement, and sudden unpleasureable situation.

The afternoon start off rushly. Wilson came fetch me, likhang n mia yang to presscot inn. He is indeed not belong to that unity. After all, he is the only one who helped out when things get tough. Very thankful and sadly, he still couldnt make it to the fac nite. It could have been so much better for him to witness his own juniors winning glory. He belanja da candidates pizza tiam... wat more can i say.... muaks babe.

The nite totally lacked of man power.... so so badly. Me, fred, and the MCs were like the
multitask robots....
i was the presenter, the registeration gal, money keeper, prize selector, presenter selector, program coordinator, tukang make up, mess made by other's cleaner....wat else...
i was basically running in and out, side to side to get things done.... as i always say, i believe i hav this leadership in me... but this one was way challenging.
i was very scared that this facnite that brought me pleasurable memory will ruin in my hand...

With just a bread n coffee, i stay busy till i started to eat dinner at 7 sumthg... the food were good...but couldnt really enjoy it with all coursemates... that nite, i saw nervous faces turned into winning faces... everyone wins.

MCs, undoubtedly did a good job. if it werent for them, their spontaneous actions and willingness to continue n not give up, the nite will totally collapse. Miayang humour is complimented by Yun Ting steadyness. u guys ROCKSSS!!!

-me candidates n mc-

Candidates... i love u all so much... sobz. lik hang is totally a nite shocker... i cant at all imagine u have such amazing voice... lets do duet one day yea... amazing! Michelle is another shiny star that nite...very sweet and pretty.... Calvin and Min Wen... love those hip hop duet dance... teach me one day. Wendy... finally sum nothyness cumes out eh... sexy kitten...wohoo.... ah bi get prince...happie. Annie got queen and totally is graceful. King... Ivan- can see the leadership from the day i first know him... from his attitude n seriousness in performing and arrangement... he totally desrved the title... awh.

Fred, i hope my fussy reminder or guidence to you were not too harsh... i geram cuz i care... u r forever my good partner n my king. Despite some flaws, you will always at the end get things done. u never give up... not even AISEC as challenging as being a KING

All juniors out there... some i remember vividly, sum i cant recognise well... i hope everyone else enjoy the nite. That was the best we could provide to u all with limited man power, cash and time. i am very happy to witness united courses and well polished performances. Very happy to noe many nice darling sorry for all the wrong doing (i thk no gua... since im so and im very sorry that i could not persuade all your seniors to join u all- such a waste. They all have exam on the other day...

Fac nite means so much to me as it was a fantastic experience to me. many people dun understand all da fuss i made due to this programme, after all, it's just a prom nite. what's more important than study and others commitment... haha. Still, i am proud of the nite and everything about it.

oh yea.... da dance season was totally much of yelling, so much of much of

The 3 biology generation were there to rock da stage...wohooo!!! so happy dancing with em...n we all are good clubber gonna be...haha

-me n michelle, junior princess-

da glory has shifted

still am princess 08/09

im not giving it up


snobbish huh?


x puas ka....