Tuesday, 30 June 2015

I think you need help!

Im pretty convinced by that.

You dont need me.

You aint looking for me.

You aint looking for me.

Suck it up!


Son of a bitch!

Sunday, 28 June 2015

le awkward dates

I dont know why i feel like cheating. Haha

Threesome date. Entirely legal and misconduct. 

Wasnt exactly planned and not organized kinda date.

Sigh. Overwhelmingly awkward and weird but end up cool je. I guess i was the only one feeling the heat. 

I was in a good mood today. But my two gentlemen were not really. I wonder why...


Sunday, 21 June 2015

Oh My Pretty Boy

I wonder why you are so pretty. They call you K boy. I call you Silly boy. 
And everyone thought you are my boy boy. 

You and your dreamy eyes. Stop luring me okay?
I dont want to fall for you. I am afraid i cant hold it back and ill messed up this beautiful friendship. 
You are a special one! 
There... I have said it. I have confessed. 
Happy, Joanne? 

Horoscope says we don't match and i can see why. 
We both are extremist and we could challenge each other limits. And you are so much younger...

Funny how cupid works! I must have step on their tails unintentionally or somehow angered them.

Thank you for your kind attention and intention. Your presence for the past 6 months have made me a different person. A happier person, a kinder one perhaps. 
After my baby passed away, i thought nothing in the world could make me feel whole again. 

Sometimes i appear difficult cuz i really dont know how to deal with this complicated feeling. Sometimes i really am angry for work purpose la. 
I cant read your mind or your intention. 
I have no experience to match.

I might be wrong of what you thought of me but i dont think i could be wrong of what i thought of you. But worry not, I am too sensible to take it too very seriously.

Bottom line is as always, i fall for a good man. I dont know why. Thanks for being around always. 


Before Anyone Else

I dont expect this relationship to go places. 
I know we can be best of friends. 
And work wise we are gonna be best partners.

Meanwhile ill know where I stand. 
You are a man with big dreams n passion. 
Nothing can hold you down and ure backing up with strong will. Something i strongly support and I would cheer you on forward. 

Good night dearest. 
Yes, there is priority to the word dear.
I called my closest dearest, dearest. 

This quote hit me hard and harsh!
And bam, i have made a confession. Haha.

i have a chill down my spine reading it as it was fucking true. You gotta live in the moment. Too many of us have been living a lifeless body for all the wrong reason until the very day we die and only realize we have yet to live a life. 

I want my every moment counts. I dont wish to wait and see and try my luck.

So tell me, do i move on cuz i have think too much or did i got it right this time?

Saturday, 20 June 2015

bff girl n boy

I came across an article about how boys n girls can become bff but either one of us will fall for each other along the friendship. I am quite agree on the details of the article. Wrong person right timing... right person wrong timing. 

Or else this bff will definitely become the best couple. 

Friday, 19 June 2015

At a night full of stars...


How do you make yourself irresistible to others? 
To be completely swoon by you and unconditionally devoted to you?

How do you sell your product by selling your service and your branding?

How do you expose yourself and get to the right lane and connect to the compatible person who could make you rather than break you?

How can you tell and how do you tell that he or she is the one that could enhance your skill and bring the best of you?

Knowing the person who could answer all the above question is a talent. You could find your whole life and found no one or you could just ask and the answer is just right in front of you. 

A hearty conversation over the dinner at a cosy coffee house i have liken. 

A place that i have dated my recent favourite persons and have grown to love the coffee over a crepe. 
I somehow like my coffee bitter now. How ironic!

Perhaps it is merely a soothing believe that if coffee could be more bitter that your life is, then i guess it didnt sucks after all. You could just drink it away. As bitter as coffee could be you just cant resist its aroma and the kick and pleasure it gives where none other drink in the world could offer. 

A stranger i grow to know. A person i grow to like. A friend i grow to appreciate. 

I am proud of my masterpiece. 


Monday, 15 June 2015

Silly Bitch

I often wonder what it will be if i ever married a muslim and i convert into one as well.
Being surrounded by Malay and made some best malay fwends and also chased by malay boy and liken some malay cutie before made me curious. I often like doing this when i dry my hair with towel.

Its not easy to look pretty berhijab cuz u r gonna hide your hair and expose only you face which basically expose your whole face. And if you dont have the best feature then you cant fake it la. You know that the hair could

Sunday, 14 June 2015

What is becoming of me?

I guess lately i have become somewhat emotionally less tortured. Thus my mind freely wandered and got lost and came back a broken and bothered one. Perhaps it got stuck in some trees in the woods and got spooked by some spirit there. Haha....

I used to be able to lay down all the messiness in my head in blog and i could open up to someone close just to release everything that's drowning me up. Sadly i could do none of the above.

I understood what is the meaning of the term complicated now. I used to use it too in explaining anything that's pertaining my family.

Hmmp. I was sick these few days and begin to develop headache which i hardly experienced. Terrible aching and bad flu n coughing... feverish. And pretty bad sleep. I dreamt of my baby love. I was feeding him and those good old times. And i woke up feeling sad and lonely and even more headache. A bad weekend. Seriously.

Im a good advisor... maybe just listener... but i cant help myself. Maybe cuz i understand myself too well. That stubborn head who is unwilling to face the true. Even i gave myself up! Sigh.

Just like i always advise people... Give time frame to any trying test. A month, a year or any setting of period. When the expiry day come you make a final call. Then you shall have no regret. Great. I already have the finest day in my head. Its not too far to keep my head bothered and not too soon to make a unsatisfactory decision. A call that has once been by passed and it is due to make its final decision.

Call me delusional or complicated... i trust my instinct.

Good night. Atm week ahead. I hate my job!

Saturday, 13 June 2015

lost count of how many concerts dy...

AIA Concert Generasi Malaysia. Real music never dies.

That was the tag. My branch won two tickets to the concert. Since AIA is PBB panel insurance company, the premium sold under loan is huge. However huge it was, the branch only enjoy 2 tickets. Lucky me i got to request to enjoy the ticket with my gurl. I wanted to go this concert once the news appear in FB. However again no kaki ever like my choice of concert artist. So u can guess how excited i was when i was told that i can have the free ticket. 2 tickets lagi n my girl said yes to go with me.

A lucky ticket fell in when another sales person cant go and kboy agreed to go as well. So 3 of us took off from my house at 5.30pm to Stadium Putra bukit jalil.

We drove through McD for dinner. It was a fun trip. Luckily i wasnt the driver cuz i was in terrible flu. Thanks to the morning rain and the craving for potato chips the night before.

We were on time at 8pm and concert start only around 8.30pm. Plenty of time for wefie n selfie. Haha...typical concert goers. I really like having prime seating. I can come late and still get best seating.

My 1st time watching them live but i already know how great they are in term of their voices and performances. Shilah totally outshine the other two men. Inarguably the crowd favourite and crowd pleaser. She sang my favourite song too. I knew she undergone some complicated romance being highlighted publicly and parents stuff as well. So when she carries the love songs, they were very emotional, i thought she was gonna cry. Or perhaps just eyes infection or something. Lol. Cuz her eyes were really wet.

Reshmonu took too much time in the 1st slot while Gary sang so little in the 3rd one. Concert ends at 10.30pm. Hmmp. Quite disappointing.

Anyway, despite my terrible condition i was blessed with 2 sayangs with me, a chance to meet my fav local artist and a cool front seat facing the stage.
Thanks AIA and PBB.

Please send me more freebies like this.

Last year those lucky one won Taylor Swift's concert. T.T

Monday, 8 June 2015

Shut up. Shut up! Talk too much. 
God. Just keep the mouth shut. 
Too noisy. Everything in the world is wrong.
Everything in the world is against u.
Everything in it revolves around you. 
Even the earth itself defies you. 

N i fucking care. Guess what?

Im done! 

Ive said it so many fucking time. Dont disturb my me time. Time when i completely wish to be alone with my own things. 

Taking away my freedom of space and now my freedom and peace of my mind. 

Friday, 5 June 2015

Stary stary night

I wish i could go back to then 

And knew what i know now

Could life be any easier? 

Come what may...

Be what may

What has passed cannot be undone

What has gone cannot be forgotten

Whatever has lost cannot be traced


Logic against lust

Reality against fantasy

Truth against lies

Head against heart

Palm to palm, cheek to cheek, skin to skin

Scents and words

Heartache to heartache 

Tell me what do i do

Deep down i know 

I always know

It never goes wrong

I hate it when i am right on the wrong

i hate it more when i am wrong on the right

Shame on you if you fooled me once

Shame on me if you fooled me twice

No more drama

Just spare me and let me go

Build them up again

Those solid rocks, ground and wall

Lost is inevitable.


Things i would do to spend a little more moment with you

Road i will take to reach for you

Fortune i will exchange just to see you again

Its okay

I will eventually

No hard feeling

Ill be okay