Monday 13 July 2015

Speaking out loud.

Someone could be angry with you just like that.
Could it be just that simple?

What about the bff promises... THE-If-you-are-mad you-gotta-let-me-know-and-we-should-talk-about-it so-it-doesnt-hurt-us-in-the-long-run?

I guess im the only one who is applying the rule. I hate when one of the closest few bring back those bad memories of mine.

The loud talk, screams, anger and hatred. The ignorance, vengeful, sarcasm and pain. All of the above experiences were with loved ones. Some of that i couldnt escape when i was young and some i dont foresee coming. But it happened. They made me a smarter but a hurtful being of today. I dont like myself. I dont appreciate myself to the extend of not treating myself kindly with food health or love.

Certain important ppl easily trigger those feeling back and they sucks. I am very against the idea of being ignored and walked away from. These people are completely moron and hav no manner to begin with. What kind of issue that cant be solved? If kenot then find a proper way to deal with it.
I was told that i was entrusted. Was the closest. The kindest. All these impression you have in me were gone when u got mad at me? Didnt that appear in your head when you intentionally ignore me?

Sigh. I guess its good that i can see this clear now.

Jiayie is coming back on August. Gosh. Happiee...
A simple homecoming by my gal could enlightened me so much. The sense of appreciation that i was always the one she has in mind and the 1st to be informed made me a privilege friend. Time doesnt define friendship. Distance doesnt define friendship.
Similar values and mutual appreciation does.
Perhaps we might have less topic to chat about now but that doesnt mean i love u any less.

Many people gave up on me.
i too gave up on a lot of low value's friends and some one-way crushes.

They came into my life, brought to life n shone some light into my dark dark world.
Spring and summer came along as well as flowers and scents... pretty delicate petals and greens
Laughter and hearts filled up my time zone.

But none choose to stay. Away they took out the light and came autumn then winter.
To wipe away memories and doubts.
As if no one has ever set foot in.
Leaving just scars and memories.
Like the star hanging on the sky, so clear yet intangible, shining so ever brightly.
Like a distanced future. A failed dream. A broken hope.
As beautiful as it seen, it will only be a far fetched wish. A wish that will never come true.
Tears stream upon face washing away pain and sorrow.
Taking away passion and desire.
Down into the drain of reality.
Leaving an empty hole in the shallow body.
Lifeless
Clueless
Fallen.
Fallen.

Until the circle continue again with the arrival of another shooting stars.
Until the day i no longer wish upon the star.
Until the day i wish no longer for a starry night.

Now i learn a new word. Haha... Platonic.
Y hadn't i come across the word much earlier?
Oh... does it matter?

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