The krazy and NTLP.

U wanna noe what is crazy? Crazy is when you try to silent your head voice. No. Im not talking about singing voice. Im telling you about talking head. Its weird sometimes when i thought about the capacity of my mind talking while my heart could stop and think and my mouth silence. What am i? 

I am intrigued by how this work but i never really understand it. There must be a name to this called sickness. I used to call myself having multiple personality disorder. Then i realized i wasnt too sick to be tagged as one thus i forgo the whole idea. I thought it would be cool to have a psycho disorder in my resume. 

Everything that i dont understand then that i possess slowly come to me as i grow to learn more word n wisdom. Although i never fail to continuously spell some words wrongly no matter how many millions times i could have spelled it... i still think that i grow up pretty well especially on my grasp in english language. Thanks to jc's diligence and ego. 

Jcdagreat. What a name i gave myself. The fearless and feisty woman she is. Woman! Gosh... a woman! Lols. 

Now lately the mind speaks too much and i have difficulty shutting it up. If i could strangle it i would. Sound so crazy isnt it. Now i cant even sure whether this is me talking or my mind is. 

Anything happen today must settle today. I never like to carry unfinished business to another day. 

I dislike people bringing the past to the presence and to talk too much ahead of the future. 1st i dislike most of the past and 2ndly i cant foresee too far ahead of tomorrow. So dont ask unless i wish to tell and you wish to know. Dont trigger me to talk but you never listen. I will hate you. Cuz you make me open up a door that i felt reluctant to and for you to left me hanging there is like leaving me unclothed. A bared soul with no safety net. You will never understand. 

Sigh. Heavy heavy sigh. I also dislike when i have questions with no answer. I cant ask and worst is when i fear for the outcome. Do not make me confused and clueless. When the mind says no the heart wants. When the heart palpitate, the mind stays numb. Stupid organs. Haha. 

Lately joanne is kinda taken over the body rather than jcdagreat. Gosh. I hate this woman! 

This is how crazy sounds like! Somebody gotta do something! 

Anyway, NTLP 18 was a great gathering. Happie to see many old birds mia faces. Heard some nice songs and very good informal emcee acts. Good senior band performance. I hope for good continuation on this routine so that i could always revisit nostalgia. Had my tummy filled with alfaris maggie goreng. I wish i had more.... sad....

I miss my stage. NTLP 14 was my greatest year. Forever love love love! I miss my moment. I miss my favourite past. I miss my sparks. I want them back!