I knew a story which can't be told recently. I do not have the permission to do so. In fact I knew many of such stories. It's just that this one sounded too familiar with the one I knew too much. Too much!
Sensibility is not something I wanted to possess. I used to go around telling the world that I'm sensible~ that I'm okay. Am I really? I probably developed high EQ which enable me to switch characters/mood according to situation. I have faith. A faith that believes my future is my exit. There is a great life awaiting and I just need to survive the present. The present is now my past and I'm moving forward, delayed slightly, broken but I am fine. Because of this trust, I took good care of myself. I became my own consultant, planner, psychologist, and doctor. LOL. Right!
I learned to seek for the right remedy, turned to the right cure whenever nightmare came. I learned how to stand tall and held my head high while balancing myself on solid ground. I shifted my attention to art and friends which both are now my golden achievement. The only weakness I possess is that I yearn for attention.
I know it isn't a crime. But the fact that I keep falling for the wrong one make me feel rejected. Dejected. My cupid fails me. I already not wanting to diagnose the problem. I wish somebody could do that for me. Tell me! What fails me? What went wrong? What did I do wrong? I really hope relationship matter is like a mathematics equation. If i fail to solve it, I'll give up. I don't necessarily need to get this problem fixed, I just need to identify it.
Sigh! Keep it unless you know what you are talking about.
LOL. I was planning to talk about women. Then I jump back to myself. I tend to lose my main point. Well, self obsession. Blame it on the ego! You see, I actually know what went wrong. I just don't see it as a problem and I wouldn't wanna trade that in for anything else. Including soul mate. Err...
Sleep deprived... :) Tonight's rain seems soothing.
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