Today was a rushed out days. My bff bday falls on weekday and we could either celebrate a weekend earlier or later. She couldn’t make it for the latter thus, out of a sudden my laid back Sunday is filled with a rushed happy leisure. 

Fang came down again. The next time we will accommodate you love. Sorry to make you making the trips down always. My girls are making so much effort to keep a relationship rocking that would put any boy to shame. 

A simple purposeful gathering to cheer our Kheng up especially she fought & won a battle with dengue fever just recently. The three of us despite being luckily near, we made an unsound vow to go trips & celebrate days together. It used to be 5 of us. Maybe soon we will resume as 5. 

I truly believe friendship depth can’t be measured by years of knowing each other but grows along the number of years. Along the years I meet new people got pretty close to a few and eventually dump others that don’t worth my care. 

I saw an old friend past me by one morning while I was driving to work. I could recognize her instantly. Part of me wanted to call out to her excitedly but part of me hold back wanting to hide my face fearing she could see me. That respond startled me because I couldn’t tell if I was ashamed of myself or that I hate her that much. 

I cannot remember what had happened to us but it must be something I hate that she did to me or that a disappointment so great she caused that made me disowned her.

Bad memory or simply I choose to forget it because recalling it saddens me. 

One of my bff was being called names. She was accused of being self pride cuz of being overly self proclaiming due to low self esteem. She got upset & I know why. I see a lot of myself in her. We have similar attitude. Normally people who have similar attitudes don’t get along well. I have2 of such friends & we proved otherwise. 

Being dealt with such issue long time ago, having to discover these problem myself made me immune to critics. I like myself, I know myself & I show myself off once in awhile. I don’t see it as a problem. If you do, kindly shut up & walk away. I’m sorry my greatness caused you any discomfort. 

 

Many people have walked out from my pathway. Some happened to be my favourite people but they choose not to keep in touch. Some I regret knowing some I regret letting go. 

Since November last year, losing the love of my life made me realize nothing is forever. Nothing!

I don’t want be attached to anything that would cost me such grief by any chance or choice.

Then the stupid cat comes along. Arghhh…..I don’t know what to do with it. I’m feeding her daily. She makes annoying sound & stick to my feet all the times I walk out. I don’t hate her. I don’t wanna love her.  

I’m finding closure in a lot of things, in a lot of ways. But definitely not to replace a loss with a love. I dwell myself into work & it hasn’t been kind at all. I find bullies everywhere & I snapped pretty easily because I’ve been working so hard & I found it being misused & unappreciated. I am after all in demand & I’m not afraid to lose my job. I could go anywhere anytime with given experience & exposure. You piss me off again & I shall let you see what I am capable of. I’m waiting for just one opportunity. It came & you’re gone!

I need a life you life sucker!

I seriously need a break prior to anymore hell break lose. My work load is getting crazy & sales are good. 

I just don’t earn as much as I’m worth of. That’s very depressing & sad. Just too sad. 

 

I’m a woman with talent with no audience. A woman with capability but immobile, temporary.

A woman who is underpaid & unloved. I’m just very uneventful you see.

However, I should be grateful. I should be. But a lot more people should be more grateful for the extra time & freedom their parents could give them for them being healthy & independent & lovely towards each other that it provides you so much of free wills to do what you do best in your prime age. 

Yes you should be grateful!

I have a soft spot for people that I care. Thus limiting it allows me to be more selfish & be more kind to myself. I think I’m getting confused & draggy. It’s time to hit the sack.