A Funny Date

Hmm... how should begin with?

Maybe I should talk about my sien-ness before the outing. I finished the photography exam at 5pm yesterday thinking that I should ajak some friend to go for a movie or something. Failed as all were busy reading for their examinations. Then I seek for some K-mates to accompany me for a K trip. Haiz, when I was invited, I need to turn 'em down due to some other commitment, and vise versa. 

 Old crush 

At first, only Fang agreed to accompany me. We have damn lotsa free days for our last papers. Then, a reluctant fwen of mine, also my regular Kmate joined in. Well, Benjamin, we just can't refuse any Karaoke invitation, don't we? He managed to persuade another guy friend to come along. Yay... so they would be four people all together. Actually, at that moment, whoever they are and how many are going no longer bothers me. I just wanna get my bitchy butt outta UKM. Desperately... 

Very tall dude

In the morning, I received a message which I suspected but not expected... Fang pulled out. Sigh... Too bad le. I was eager to sing with you actually. So, after getting myself ready, I went out and joined the other 2 guys. I was afraid that I might not be able to get along with the new friend. Some bad experiences with some passive newbies made me ridiculed to entertain unsociable strangers. I am thankful that he is not at all passive. 

Gayish eh~ haha... na, not match pun

Every K season, I just don't simply suang2 go high and enjoy the songs. I actually do evaluation on my voice and I measure my improvements. Wow... I successfully tackle "Fighter" by Christina. Not perfect, but a better try compare to the last attempt. Some other songs that gave me pleasure includes "I turn to you" by Xtina and "I still believe" by Mariah Carey. I hit many high notes effortlessly, and it was strong vocal. 

Finally!!! I was a little taken aback when I sang without much hesitation. I hope it did not happened by chance tho. My vocal is the greatest gift in life I posses and I will do anything to let it be heard, beautifully and worthily. I hope I do not appeared snobbish or pure amateur, someone who adore her partially developed voice with no sense of respect to great talents out there. Well, I believe one thing. If I don't love my voice, I wouldn't want to stand on the stage. I would not enjoy performing and I definitely would not ever dare to dream of being a singer. It will be meaningless! That's how this urge of wanting my voice to be polished come from. So, knowing where is my strength and weakness is the 1st step for a learner like me. My progression is slow, but I am glad to see the changes in me- I'm evolving! 

 Have bad skin lately

It has been a long time since I sang "Bleeding love" with such insanity. This new fwen of mine is a fun company. After the K trip, we were like some lost souls in the city. Debating where to go, and where to eat. It was a fun ride, and we had nice dinner. It was a very weird composition of gang and the whole outing was a little sudden. Hmm... But it was a right outing! Benjamin and I found another fun K-mate to join the group. Haha.... Suang tim!!! 

Saw PT31st advertisement at green-box's screen... I miss PT so much!

Lastly, thanks Ben. You always seem to appear in the right time when I most needed assistance. Good luck in your relationship yea... Dun always debate with your gal la. Looking forward for crazy K-trip with you all  again. By then the weirdness will disappear but the craziness will comes alive.

It's Over

This was how i look like. 2 hours b4 the stupid test.... Fang Fang cleared my statement today... I don't hate photography....after all, I took this subject for a reason other than to clear my PB status.

 But I cannot help feeling dissatisfied paying RM 50 for a stupid function for a book like this.... nice on the cover doesn't it? The content was terrible...totally OMG... how shud I begin with?! Wrong compositions, massive spelling errors, lotsa repetitions...  Purely immature, unprofessionally written... I wonder who would publish such nonsense book other than UKM. And I cannot believe a Photography book can be in just pure black n white printing, when you are teaching a subjects that relates to colour n lighting...

Am pissed.... still is.... Final was easy... few questions not found in the book, that one i don't blame you, Bahagian B, some farking easy questions that could never cross my mind... too bad, I glanced through that part nia... 40% in total!

I dunnoe how to make angry face.... I was Mad,... MAdDer when I was in the bus complaining to a fwen who wish to take this course next sem!!! PLS don't if :

1) You really wanna learn something from this course

2) They don't change lecturer

3) You have other choice of PB

4) You love photography!!!

After much failure of making angry expression, which all eventually end up as monkey faces, I gave up la... This semester me screw up lotsa academic stuff... I wonder how is my scores in all finals... 

I guess knowing there is no more chance for me to score 1st honor really bothers me- I wasn't pushing myself hard enough....

Oh well, last one on the 11th, that one I memang aim de =)

Field Trip at D-paradise, Melacca... long ago lo

Field work at D-paradise resort~

A nice place to explore!

 Some berries... Brazilian I think

 I still do not know how to differentiate Nangka and Cempedak

The carnivorous plant~Monkey cup pitchers- the Biggest collection in world!!! Can u believe it!!! In MAS??

 My team mates~ They called us 1 malaysia

 1st visit was on 9th/10... almost missed PT rehearsal... Teary me~

My god... Cute dao... but went they got too close, I stood frozen cuz I was afraid 

 Lotsa farm animals there... a lost kambing~ pity wei...

 oo.... not allow to go in c, unless we go as visitor... not researchers

One of the 5 traps we set...

Of all the field trips we have been so far, I am afraid I haven't even spot one single Heratemis Walker yet... Probably there is, but I can't be sure of it... NO CONFIDENT!!! 

Haiz...small abundance, only 5 species in MAS...Cham lo

> <

Specifically to SLY

Happy birthday to you... 

Really wanna celebrate your big day with the geng but unfortunately it falls on the exam week. U must be cursing inside too...haha.

Probably you don’t know me well, but I am a “gam sing” gal. Hardly in person but yea, blog is my emotional channel, somewhere I can voice out all things. So, don’t be surprised when you suddenly find me writing about you in my blog, like today’s post.

I cannot recall how you look like in 1^st year when I was making the slides show for you. I wasn’t aware of KTSN dancers then and I never really took effort to know anyone of you. I had reason for that. I was a lost soul there in PT29th. I was fooled into the performer group, but failed to pull myself out of the troupe, so I found it hard adjusting myself into accepting that I was going to dance with all these new people I met in university.

I cannot speak Mandarin well and I don’t even have a close friend with me to begin with. I was practically alone in UKM, alone in KKM except for my roomie, and alone in PT. I was self conscious and if you ever notice me, I didn’t talk much too. But I recognise many faces. Especially yours... Your look was too “geng tim” to be forgotten.

Then came 2^nd year. We all danced for Bangi. Maybe I never really thank you officially but I was grateful to have you gals with me. Although I was complimented that I improved tremendously in year 2 (cuz I managed to shake off my self-consciousness, trust me, it was really bad), you gals and Darren & Seat Fang helped me a lot.
You gals made me feel safe and guided. Still, there were distances between us. That year we had a huge group of dancer and there were small groups among us. Again, I was the lost soul, but this time, like all the time in my life, I belong to all groups, never specifically own by any. It kinda sucks sometimes...

 

Then came 3^rd year... This year, we became the eldest senior dancers, minus Edison who skipped 2 years. We have nobody above us but definitely a bunch below us. Pressure came in as I knew I would be expected to deliver what a senior dancer could. You and Melody like always, are superb! Nobody can deny this! I just don’t praise you publicly. 

Well, ego issues and we dancers have this inner understanding or awareness. We don’t need to say out loud, we sensed and we felt. I adore your capability very much. I couldn’t shake off the fact that I still am lack of confidence in partnering dance. After being lift up 1meter plus above the ground, horizontally facing the sky in PT30th still I couldn’t lift up my confidence. I guess not enough determination gua...and I basically gave up trying. It’s one of my regrets in PT. 

 SO Much of ex-moments.... let's talk about now...

This year, we managed to stay intact as one big group and the rest was history. The whole journey was still fresh in my mind and the 2 months we spent together (4 days a week, approximately 5 hours per day, 24/7 musically and emotionally inclined to PT and each other), were awesome. 

 ***

I do not know how to classify you. I just know that perhaps I don’t know you too well to be called as your besties, I am definitely not your course mate or your roomie and I am incapable of being your special one. Your bf sudah rampas la.... haha.

But, dearie, you obtain a spot in my heart. You are certainly a clear subject in my life pages and one who are worthy to be recalled from time to time. 

Geli-fying but true

I will always remember someone who demanded me to take KTM to UM-PT. Damn u! Haha... I will make sure to remember the gal who steal my partner and make him saying me less. >< And how could I forget a gal who speak rojak more than i do~

Remember, we are forever linked, be it you suka or not, once a PT dancer, always a PT dancer. You will need to C my face every single year of PT Malam Persembahan UKM as we are gonna sit together as audiences. X pergi de boycott a~

For that, you better help me

stay alive, stay healthy, stay happie and never stay skinny. 

Losing a junior dancer made me realize I cannot bear losing more important fwens in my life.

With this,

I wish you a blessing birthday from the bottom of my heart. Erm, I am obviously incapable to write such heart wrenching, awhhhh to awe-face pulling, and tear dropping heartfelt piece of blog....

I copied from just_want_you_to_be_happie.com/jcdagreat

LOL

Muah

Lately

Oh gosh....

Loneliness is creeping all over me...

After PT, there is not a day goes by without that feeling conquering my sanity. Despite all the undone workloads and Internship stuff, i still feel like living lifelessly. My mind keeps recalling those days and it sucks! I cannot seems to move on, just yet. 

I am always ready to take in commitment to stuff i like, but it's just so hard to say goodbye.

A weakness i never seem to get rid of. Baby JC. Deng!

Somehow SINUX keeps me guessing who the gal he was referring to. Haimai-sui de, you go tell me you share similar faith with me... now make me so geboh liao... 

Was chatting with a stranger today...now i can pronounce him as a FB fwen. For your information, i only appear lunatic infront of my besties, and i look super ego when i deal with strangers. This stranger seems friendly and probably cuz he speaks proper english, we communicated well. Normally i dun even reply their friendly hello in FB chat. So he was like ' hey, u look so beautiful and im in love~ and i was like pls dont...haha' 

You c, i do not allow people who i don't love to love me~ i will love the attention but, at the same time i will feel bothered and probably scare. So, he and i came to a conclusion, haha, another theory JcDagreat proposed

When you truly love somebody, You will not simply say I love You to that person. At least Not b4 you successfully tackle that person. It's really not easy~ Sigh!!!

Arghhh~ There is this dear fwen of mine who recently changed his relationship status. Hmm, not sure who is that gal, but congratz to you. Eventually you bring the egg, but i truly hope that gal exists. Haha.... Bring her out into the public! I wanna C how good is she compare to me! lol~

Final exam is coming...3 subjects is done. 

1 assignment based. 1 proposal. 1 already done.

3more to go~ and not to forget LI misery!!!!!

I miss my dancers very much!

Cannot wait for our BBQ party

XD

The Last PT journey...

 AM I SURE.... Last?? Hmmm.....

This is where it begins.....The audition room~This time, at night

During camp peserta... tough days~

A dance piece i am most not confident of~ traditional piece

The most difficult piece.... imagine a music with just woman's screaming as rhythm...  

 Opening dance~ my fav

The 2nd Dance

Hmm...The climax dance... Smiley version... We were not suppose to smile actually~

The finale piece with dear Exco~

Senior dancers.... 

Love this most ^^

Finale poses~

Miss u guys already~

Is this function huge? Well, c for yourself~

All PT-rians....

The happiest review i got was that the show is great. Drama n dancing was electrifying... Well, not really that word used but yea, it was that good! 

The best review obviously is when pumpkin told me from a far, she can actually saw and felt that we were smiling... =) and that i looked prettie....ahahaha... Well, i need that once in awhile!

Couldn't tell you enough the joy and the fun we celebrated that night.

I was told that i shined on stage... =)

But what most important for me is that i grew as a performer and i would love to continue doing it....

Today was a hectic day....Well, it's Thursday anyway...

A day I will normally be scolded by Dancing tcher most of the time cuz I will show sign of fatigues and dance blurry. My presentation was fine and I was praised as my slides were good. But god dammit, how could i not notice i missed the objectives altogether.... Luckily la.... The examiner was good~

Wei Lao Yen was conducted today... I collected many photo albums and i am now fully loaded with photos and videos.... Over flooded to be precise!!!

Will soon publish nice shots i grabbed and collected here... 

Right after the celebration, we went to Ed house to conduct a surprise bday party to Huirung and Peishia. Was a lot of fun and although I appeared blurrish and they kept bullying me with bad angle and timing shots of mine, i still love em very much~

Very much!!!